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On Dec 30, 2024, I returned home to Sierra Madre, CA after being in Illinois visiting my family for Christmas. I had a few days remaining before returning to my office and was looking forward to some moments of planning for the new year and spending time in nature reflecting and connecting to myself and the world around me. On New Year’s Day, my husband and I ventured to the top of Jones Peak in the San Gabriel Mountains - we were above the clouds and could see the Rose Bowl blimp in Pasadena and down below was beautiful Altadena. On Jan 4, we mosied over to the Westside of Los Angeles to hike near Malibu and Pacific Palisades. We watched the sunset from Pacific Coast Highway and had dinner nestled in Topanga Canyon. The new year was off to a great start focused on health, wellness, and sustainability. On Jan 7, the Palisades and Eaton fires, fueled by hurricane-force winds, uncontrollably eviscerated thousands of acres of land, thousands of homes and businesses, and decimated the gorgeous natural landscape that makes LA feel like home to so many people. These fires engulfed LA, including the hiking trails I was just on. Nothing could prepare someone for the physical, emotional, financial, and logistical toll a natural disaster like this would have taken. Personally, my family and home survived, but a day doesn’t go by where my heart doesn’t break for those I know and don’t know who lost everything. On the night the Eaton fire sparked, we chose to evacuate to stay with family in Glendale. We have been here since that night and will likely stay for an undetermined amount of time due to risks known and unknown of living close to urban fire burn zones. While getting a house key duplicated at a hardware store, I noticed my favorite color in the paint sample section (pictured above) and pulled it out to take a closer look. Normally, I would see this color and get excited, as I often refer to this soft, gentle, soothing shade of light blue as “Made New Blue”. This color is a theme throughout my website, office, and social media branding, including these newsletters. I even bought a license plate frame in this color! It resonates with my soul in a special way. However, according to the hardware store paint selection, this color has nothing to do with my practice’s name - they named it: “It Is Well”. When I saw this, tears immediately started streaming down my face as they are right now as I am writing this, and I was struck by how, despite all that has happened, “it is well.” This is a truth I believe in, regularly sing in worship services, and have heard throughout my life as a reminder of holding on to hope when it feels like all is lost. Being well is different than being happy. Certainly different than telling yourself to swallow your emotions and just be grateful (gratitude is often helpful, but not at the cost of having room for all of your feelings). To me, being well is a state of mind in which you are present with yourself in a given circumstance making space to weep, rage, or whatever emotion is needed at the time. It is about fully expressing yourself in your pain and having hope for the future. Stating “it is well” is to bring into sharp focus what matters most to you and fiercely protecting that as you rebuild and reshape your next chapter after tragedy. Being well is not about being perfect, strong, or even okay; rather, it is about being exactly who you need to be for yourself and the people who need you - continuing to take one small step after another as an act of rebellion against the destruction and devastation around you. It is a poignant reminder of your resilience and neediness at the same time. Of all the names, of all the colors, this name was matched with this color. I am a believer in signs, messages, and affirmations that exist in the world if we look for them. This one fell into my lap at the right time and I hope it does for you as well. Wellness looks different for every person, every heart, every circumstance. And don’t forget, reminding yourself it is well is not a diminishing of what you are going through. But maybe it can serve as a beacon of hope and light that your story does not end in the tragedy you are currently navigating. Mountain clarity: Nature is powerful. It is beautiful and also terrifyingly mighty in destructive ways. Something I want to be more mindful of is how I am respecting the natural world in the choices I make and the sustainability I engage in. This got me thinking - what could it look like to be mindful of the world around us more intentionally, while also showing that same level of honor to our internal worlds? Sometimes, our emotions can feel fiery and sometimes they can be gorgeous and connecting. On either end of the spectrum and everywhere in between, we have the opportunity to listen to the information our emotions are telling us about what feels safe, what feels true, what feels like love. The opposite can also be true - we tend to feel it in our bodies and our minds when something feels unsafe or emotionally dangerous. Perhaps, it is time to listen to what is going on inside and outside of ourselves and take the messages seriously. Journaling prompts for reflection: What does it mean to you to be well? Have you ever found yourself conflating being well with being happy? When was the last time you noticed yourself being fully authentic and present with your emotions in a given moment? Did that authenticity feel different than trying to keep it all together? Have you ever gone through something that made you have to focus in on what was most important to you and forgo everything else? What was that like for you? How has that experience changed your perspective in the present? Are there colors or other things that appeal to your senses in a resonating way? What are those things? What makes them special and how can you incorporate them into your life more as a means of self-care and enjoying life? Have you been affected by the fires in LA? If so, do you need resources? If you need help of any kind, please consider reaching out to me or someone you trust to connect you to the support you need.
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